2004 Detroit Auto Show: Topless In Detroit

Topless in Detroit…

Detroit January 10, 2004; No no I am not talking about the titty bars located across the river in Windsor o the semi clad women in the Dearborn semi nude bars…no no I am talking about the lack of tops here in cobo hall…lots of beautiful bodies without tops…if you think this is sexist you may be right…because many car guys can get worked up about beautiful cars almost as intensely as they will about a beautiful woman.

Just a year ago it was easier to find a topless woman near Cobo hall, than a new production convertible in Cobo hall…most car makers apparently believed the convertible was passé and couldn’t be a profitable seller…well in 2004 that all seems to have changed…there are lots of convertibles and even a few rag tops as well.

As many of you know I am and have always been a convertible man, my first was a 1959 bug eye sprite back in the very early sixties… That was an era when convertible drivers waved to each other and flashed their lights at each other even while cruising along an interstate…ah those were the days, when another driver lifted his (or her) arm it wasn’t to “flip you off” but affirm just how cool and smart we sports car guys were.

As a convertiphile I am awed not only by good looks and great performance but I am now more impressed with a car I can love and use every day…each limitation reduces the enjoyment quotient so I really consider the practical side of rag tops as well

I know I know some of you out there in TACHland don’t believe that the words practical and convertible should be present on the same screen, but I do and it’s my article...so please be open minded.

One of the benefits of attending the Detroit Auto Show…in addition to the free food and free food is the ability to see and touch and sit in almost all the cars that will be sold here in the US…and that’s just what I did. I not only looked at and sat in every convertible but looked in every trunk…yeah that’s right if it was a convertible I looked in the trunk. My eyeballing allowed me to gauge the practicality or non practicality of each convertible.

Why would I do this? Well as I said I am a convertible nut and when I own one I want to drive it every day and not have to think about its limitations…the fewer the limitations the more I can drive my love instead of another car.

Some limiting situations:

On the way home from a movie you and your wife stop at the supermarket, “yes dear but lets be careful about the amount of food we buy” – what kind of selfish Big Jerk are you?

You take your love-car at the airport…on your flight home is your next door neighbor who is returning from a three day trip with a carry-on ….and asks you for a ride home. What kind of selfish Big Jerk are you?

You pick up your goalie daughter from practice and her best friend teammate needs a ride home. What kind of selfish Big Jerk are you?

You are out in the wine country with another love…you find a great wine and purchase a case….oh its only another 3 hours for you to hold that case on your lap dear. What kind of selfish Big Jerk are you?

You and your wife are ready to leave on a little fall getaway… you know, colorful leaves… brilliant blue sky …the still warm air surrounding you as you cruise down a back road…sounds pretty good and it’s a situation that reinforces the brilliance and romanticism of the convert in the garage…its time to go and your wife sweetly asks you to come up to the bedroom to get her luggage…a small carry-on and a make-up bag, she has spent 2 hours planning and eliminating and squeezing…because you have calmly explained that storage space will be limited…as you see her luggage and sweetly exclaim, ”Oh My G-d” that thing will never fit, do you really need to take everything in there?”…bye-bye weekend… hello to “you mean you bought a car that won’t even hold these small pieces of luggage …what kind of selfish Big Jerk are you?

Some convertibles have back seats which can double as storage space. This sounds good but means that with the top down you luggage is not secure because its sitting in the open...ok so you close the top at every rest or scenic stop…or with the top up you can squeeze the luggage in the trunk because the top isn’t in it…so the trip you take is in a top up convertible which becomes ... “honey if the top needs to be up to take the luggage why don’t we just take the minivan…so now you can see why practicality is important even in a convertible.

The above scenarios have led to the development of the “Big Jerk…Little Jerk” TACH Convertible Carrying Capacity Rating System or BJLJTCCCRS…we know that if you are not a convertible lover anyone who buys one will be considered a jerk…and if the limitations are so obvious, a Big Jerk. So convertible buyers will be rated as BJ’s or LJ’s.

Make...........................Model..............................Seats................BJ/LJ Rating

Audi	S-4 (rag top)	4 but really trip 2	LJ
	TT(rag top)	2	BJ
Porsche	Boxter(rag top)	2+2	Rich BJ
	911(rag top)	2+	Richer BBJ
BMW	Z-4(rag top)	2	LJ
	M3(330i)(325i) (rag top)	4 but really trip 2	LJ
	645(rag top)	4	Rich LJ
VW	New Bug (rag top)	4 but really trip 2	BJ
Toyota	Spyder(rag top)	2	BBJ
	Solara (coming soon) (rag top)	4	?
Lexus	SC430	2+2	LJ
Maserati	Spyder Vintage(rag top)	2	Richer LJ-Custom Luggage only $2500
Ferrari	360 Spyder(rag top)	2	It Don’t Matter
Cadillac	XLR	2	BJ
Pontiac	Solstice	2	LJ
Saab	9-3(rag top)	4	LJ
Chevrolet	Corvette(rag top)	2	LJ
	SSR	2	LJ
Mazda	MX-5 Miata(rag top)	2	LJ
Volvo	C70(rag top)	4	LJ
Mitsubishi	Eclipse Spyder(rag top)	4	LJr
Aston Martin	DB 9(rag top)	2+2	It Don’t Matter
JagUar	XKE(rag top)	2+2	LJ
Ford	Thunderbird	2	LJ
	Mustang	4	LJ
Honda	S 2000(rag top)	2	LJ
Chrysler	Crossfire	2	BJ
	Viper(rag top)	2	?
	PT Crusier(rag top)	4	LJ
	Sebring(rag top)	4	LJ
Mercedes-Benz	CLK(rag top)	4	LJ
	SL 55	2	LJ
Nissan	350Z(rag top)	2	LJ

* Only two riders plus luggage rating